done and done

that's how i would describe the olympics, particularly the winter sort. i think it's fair to say most of the country doesn't care about the olympics as evidenced by american idol's dominance in the ratings. frankly, i'd rather watch kristy swanson facepaint the ice more than i'd like to see sasha cohen land a triple axel, whatever the hell that is (apparently impossible since no one can land it in competition). seriously, did you see buffy's face bounce off the ice a few weeks ago? it was classic. i felt pretty bad for buffy, but it was great tv. why would i want to watch professionals (or more accurately top amateurs) do their best not to screw up, when i can watch a bunch of scrubs work their hardest to be better than most normal people? let's be honest, the best part of olympic skating is watching the experts fall on their asses and slide across the ice. sorry, i'm over it (much like i'm over the bachelor, but that's another story).

and here's another problem i have. on one hand, you have jackasses like bode miller, who seemingly could care less about representing the us and winning a medal. he comes off as a selfish little punk (and probably is). then you have shani davis and chad hedrick, who i respect a million times more than no-medal miller, but in their bickering about who disrespected who sound like a couple of little school girls. just shut up, skate fast, win medals, and thank each other for pushing each other to be great. basically, it boils down to the fact that to the rest of the world (or at least most of the world) cares about the olympics, and many americans, including olympians, don't care. they care about how many endorsements they'll get, or what sitcom they'll guest star in, or which late-night couch they'll sit on, but not about being the best.

finally, my biggest problem with the olympics is nbc. i hate bob costas. he might be the second worst sports commentator in the history of the world (right on the heels of joe buck, another annoying little midget). moreover, in this day and age, how can i not find out what happened when the events take place during my lunch hour? am i expected to not surf the internet? or listen to the radio or watch the news? it's like tivo-ing a football game to watch the next day - there's no way i can avoid finding out what happened, and thus am not inclined to waste hours of my life watching something when i already know the outcome. as much as it might pain nbc, they should show the events live, and then just show highlights for an hour or two in primetime. they'd have higher ratings if they mixed olympic highlights with their regular shows (although their normal programming does suck pretty bad). most people don't care about the olympics at all, and of those who do, i'm willing to bet a vast majority would be perfectly content just watching american athletes. i personally would rather watch an lesser american compete in a cool event like the biathalon than watch every nation's best ice dancers (who by the way all sucked).

now i'm angry at myself for wasting this much time talking about something so stupid. the olympics are done. and by done i mean uninteresting and stupid, not unlike watching me lose over and over and over in connect four.

MO

rivalry schmilvary

flipping channels, i've come across duke at unc. great rivalry. 2 schools, geographically close, great history, blah blah blah. i'm so tired of hearing how unc/duke is the biggest rivalry in sports. how can 2 colleges, who are both known nationally for one sport (yes each is good at other sports, but those aren't on espn every week), and play each other 2, maybe 3 times a year, be the biggest rivalry??? i'm sorry, it's not the biggest rivalry. it's not. and neither is the cubs/cardinals rivalry. sure, stupid people from st louis come up and drink at sluggers and cubby bear. sure, cub fans travel to st louis for a weekend series. but guess what, it's not a rivalry when one team wins EVERY year. my cubs friends are going to hate me, but until the cubs consistently beat the cardinals (not once every decade), or at least show they can compete, it's never going to be the greatest rivalry.

granted i'm a little biased, but anyone who knows sports and ever visited the northeast should know the yankees/red sox is the greatest rivalry. period. this almost fails the test associated with the cubs/cardinals (ie: the yankees always win - 26-6 world series championships), but have you ever heard wrigley erupt in a 'st louis sucks' chant while the cubs are playing the pirates? or dukies start one of their notoriously creative chants directed at unc while virginia is playing duke? no and no. it just doesn't happen. i can't tell you, however, how many times the vaunted (and oh so creative) 'yankees suck' chant has rained down on fenway while the yankees are in another time zone. and fenway is probably the only stadium i've ever visited where i thought twice about wearing my jeter shirt. when i went to my first yankee/white sox games, my law school friends advised me against wearing yankee paraphenalia to comisky because the fans can get a little rough. i suppose if you consider a drunk 65 year old taunting us with his arms twisted as K's. yeah, not so much. as further support, i present you this tale:
friends were visiting from out of town, and we decided to go to a local bar for dinner and drinks. as we're waiting for a table, i'm talking to my friend and i have on my yankees hat. i see some random girl approaching me and i think she's just drunk and stumbling toward me. to my surprise, she's completely sober and walks up to me and says 'hey, i just want you to know the yankees suck!' this is in a bar, in chicago. this was before the red sox won in '04, so i suppose she was an expert in sucking since her team had sucked her entire life, but c'mon, tone it down - i was just waiting for a table.
so thank you red sox nation, for it is, in large part, your insanity, that helps keep the yankees/red sox rivalry the greatest current rivalry in all of sports. and as much as i despise the red sox, i respect them and thoroughly enjoy all 18 or 19 regular season games and the inevitable clash in the alcs.

i have to go to bed now. i'm sick.

MO

another year, another monkeybowl

the first weekend in february proved quite an eventful one. sunday marked the 5th consecutive year jen and i have hosted our superbowl party, monkeybowl. unlike past years when we've had some divide in rooting interests, all of our guests were rooting for the steelers, including mr. pOTTsburgh, joe. steelers won, seahawks lost, refs blew some calls, quit your crying little girls.

in case anyone was wondering, here are some of the final Monkeybowl V stats:
231 --> wings
136 --> meatballs
59 ---> beers
17 ---> ciders and hard lemonades
5 ----> dips (1 hot spinach, 1 cold spinach, 1 veggie, 1 'spicy', 1 7-layer)
1 ----> pan of homemade peanut butter brownies
1 ----> pan of vanilla pudding pie
1 ----> drunken salami
>1 ---> stomach aches and hangovers monday

i'm happy to report no one was seriously injured during the celebration, unless you count the seahawk that was drowned in a pool of it's own tears. stupid seahawks.

also this weekend: saturday was beanes' second birthday. to clarify, this is not the second anniversary of his adoption, but his actual birthday. we celebrated with a steak dinner, and a trip to doggy daycare for Monkeybowl. after a day of wild partying, i'm happy to report he's returned to his big doggy schedule of sleeping. 18 hours a day.

finally, jack johnson's latest cd was released today. while it's not a true 'release' because it's for the curious george movie, it's still jack, and it's still good. for the most part. some songs are definitely geared toward kids, but it is a kids movie, so it's acceptable. not his best work, but i'm still listening to it. love me some jack (and, thankfully, jen is finally coming around...).

MO

clip of the day

thanks to zeke jr for providing this clip - it's freakin' hilarious for 2 reasons:

1. this poor kid gets run. over. and,
2. at the end of the clip - check out #89 - the danny almonte of pop warner. not the quickest off the ball, but when your 6'4" 250 and playing against 5 year olds i suppose you don't have to be.

MO